Wednesday, 30 June 2010
Sunday, 27 June 2010
Wednesday, 23 June 2010
(well let's just clarify that statement - I will not be working in this job. I will still be working bloomin hard as a mum and housewife, as PTA secretary, as a comfort to my Nan, doing my kids homework etc etc. Point being I am just giving up my job. It may be foolsish to say so on here, so for those that know me, keep it under your hats... :)
Anyway the last few weeks I have been quieter than usual on here and I have missed it, but my mind has been otherwise occupied and I know God hasn't been placing too much on my shoulders, no deep issues as I have had my own to deal with! I was ill and things came to a real head with work. It has been a weird old time it's true. But in all that, I have had so much peace about it all. I made the decision to give up work (won't bore you with the details, but it's not been easy...) as of Christmas this year. And I can't wait.
I have spent 6 months thinking this over and have swung from one extreme to the other. I have been fearful: fearful that God would want me to carry on! fearful of what I would do without work. Fearful that I would be letting people down.
I have been striving: striving to make this decision too quickly, striving to find answers in my own strength.
I have been impatient (in way too many ways to list...!
But I have also been joyful, uplifted, rewarded, appreciated and mostly prayerful. Actually I'm sure God is sick of hearing about my business... And the funny thing is that as I look back over the last 6 months, I can see God has actually answered so many of my prayers and requests about this issue, even when I thought he hadn't. I have been so wound up in the details of it that I couldn't see he was shaping me and the journey forward on this. And although I have been worried,fearful etc, I have actually been peaceful about it too (well, mostly...!) The business has caused me to be stressed a lot in the past and actually now, in this whole process which should have been the most stressful, there has been none. I thank God for that.
The one thing I was occupied with most has been wanting to do the right thing by God. As you know listening to him is still pretty new to me but I think I've been overly worried about it. And actually he has gven me confirmation at every turn - far more than I can ignore. Scriptures, advice and words from friends, even the sermon a few weeks back was perfect for me. I cannot ignore it and what's more I know I am doing the right thing.
I have no idea what he has planned for me next, although I am praying for a 6 month break.. (ideally abroad, somewhere hot... ;) ) but I am so excited.
I can't tell you how alien this is to me - I have probably posted about it before, but I am Mrs super-organised, I have everything planned to a T, I know what I want and I go get it. Having no plans would have, in the past, made me rather twitchy, but right now, well, I just feel... calm. Yes calm is the best way to describe it. I am not planning anything. I am leaving it all up to Him upstairs. Doors may open, doors may close, but it's bloody great!!
Thursday, 17 June 2010
Now I have always been a bit of a rebel. I naturally go against the grain. If someone says I can't do something it's like a red rag and I go all out to prove them wrong. I am noy good at submitting to authority if I don't agree with it.
That is changing, it's true, as I go along this jounrey I am being less of a rebel. But a few things came up last night that were interesting...
...For rebellion, is like the sin of divination, and arrogance like the evil of idolatory... (1Samuel 15:23)
So that implies that rebellion is as bad as a form of witchcraft. Oh boy, I am in trouble... ;)
Submit yourselves for the Lord's sake to every authority instituted among men: whether to the king, as sureme authority, or to govenors, who are sent by him to punish those who do wrong and to commend those who do right. (1 Peter 2:13-14)
Sumission as our vicar says, is not 'cool' in todays society. We pride ouselves on being strong, individuals, making our own way in life. We teach our chidlren to question almost everything, we don't believe the things we read in the midea (thankfully...), we question scientific evidence. So to actually sumbit to those in authority - well that is not easy.
So is all rebellion wrong? Obviously any authority that tells us to do something against Gods laws would be wrong but what about daily life stuff? Is it ok to sometimes be a rebel? or never? I struggle with going along with stuff I don't agree with. Nicky Gumbel in his Alpha book gives a great example of submission - he talks about Sandy Millar who was the Vicar of HTB. When Sandy was the curate, although he often disagreed with the vicar, he always submitted to his authority, let him make the decisions. Mostly people thought that Sandy completely agreed with the Vicar. But when the vicar left, Sandy took over and he changed everything! So he had quietly bided his time, submitted to his 'boss' and when the time came and he had the authority he then exercised it. Perhapos we should all be a bit more like that?
Wednesday, 16 June 2010
Monday, 14 June 2010
Saturday, 12 June 2010
Something that came up in the Living Free course I am doing: 'We are in the business of being changed'.
We should be prepared to change. Hands up who can point out someone who has been a Christian for years and yet refuses to be moved on issues or listen to new ideas? Having served on the PCC of a village church some years back I came across several of these types! (no judgement here though...;) )The line used at the course was 'we are in the business of being changed' and I thought that was a great line - I mean the whole point about getting saved is that we are changed, through Christ, and we should go on being changed by him, for our entire earthly lives.
We are in Christ, so change needn't be scary - we can lean on him. so why are people who profess to be Christians so alien to change...?